As I wrote at the end of the year, one of my resolutions for 2019 was to get a better grasp on my finances by tracking in a detailed way all of my discretionary spending for the month of January. It was a little tricky to do because of the way my husband and I separate our accounts and divide our expenses, but I analyzed the data as best I could. It was an eye-opening experiment.

January was a bit of an anomaly for us because my mother-in-law was staying with us for nearly the entire month, and my mom was staying with us for a few days at the beginning of the month, so our family of three was essentially a family of four. This increased the amount of money we spent on groceries and eating out. We also took a long-weekend trip to the South Carolina low country, incurring lodging and extra fuel expenses and eating all our meals at restaurants for several days, and we took a few day trips as well. It’s fair to say our spending in January was a little higher than it might have been in a more typical month. But things always vary month-to-month, and I figured this was as good a month as any to analyze.

I know some of you are probably saying, who cares? If you can afford these things and you enjoy them, why not spend money on them? You can’t take it with you! The answer is that I have big financial goals that could ultimately give me greater satisfaction than, say, a bunch of dinners out that I won’t remember 20 years from now. At the end of my life, will I really think back on the nice clothes I wore or the fancy meals I ate, or will I be more thankful that I saved enough to send my kids to college, travel the world, and retire sooner and more comfortably? The answer seems pretty straightforward to me. I’m not really interested in extreme frugality, but I want to balance the fun I have today with preparing for the future. Just like how we spend our time, how we spend our money should be a reflection of our values and priorities.

First, it’s worth noting some expenses I’ve already cut. We don’t have cable. We have a digital antenna that gets us a few local channels, and I alternate between Netflix and Hulu subscriptions depending on which service has what I want to watch that month. We don’t watch much TV and really don’t have the time for it now anyway, so there’s no point in spending money on cable. Additionally, I gave up my Audible subscription and have been using my library’s Libby app. I often have to wait for a book to become available, but I spend so much less time listening to audio books these days that waiting a few weeks really isn’t a problem. I also gave up my gym membership last year. I had been paying $80 a month for a family membership so that I could put my son in the gym’s child care while I worked out, but I was only going a few times a month on the weekends and my husband literally never used the membership — not once. Driving to and from the gym and the inefficiencies related to getting ready and out the door cost me a half hour every time I went, and I decided it just wasn’t worth the time or money. I traded my gym membership for workout videos and yoga at home.

I excluded from my spending analysis expenses that are fairly fixed and essential, like the mortgage, utilities, and day care. There may be ways to cut these costs, but I feel like they are already pretty well optimized and would be hard to reduce. I also decided not to include things like medical expenses and car repairs here. What I really wanted to know was how much I’m spending on day-to-day impulses and thoughtless expenditures.

I won’t bore you with all the detailed numbers from the month, but here’s an overview of how we spent our money in January. For groceries, dining out, and gas, I included my husband’s spending as well as my own, because they go on the same credit cards (one for gas and groceries, one for all fast food purchases, to maximize cash back rewards) and they were too difficult to separate. The expenses listed here for things like personal care products and clothing, however, are mine alone.

1. Gas. We spent about $550 on gas in the month of January. This really surprised me. I have a long commute but a pretty fuel-efficient car, and my husband works from home, so I figured this number would be a lot lower — maybe more like $300. Granted, our trip to South Carolina took about five and a half hours each way, and as I mentioned, there were a few regional day trips as well. I’m not really sure how to cut this number short of moving, changing jobs, or taking fewer trips. The first two options probably aren’t going to happen any time soon, and since occasional family trips are memorable experiences, I don’t feel the need to cut back too much. Still, it’s good to understand the true expenses so we can make more educated decisions about how often and where to travel.
2. Lodging. We spent $372.10 on lodging during our mini-vacation. For three nights and four people, I think this number is pretty reasonable. We booked one night in a hotel through Hotwire and two nights in a house through Airbnb.
3. Groceries. This number is definitely unusual. My mother-in-law shops for groceries more frequently than we do on a normal basis, and my mom tends to buy grocery items without thinking much about price. When it’s just us, I often meal-plan and order groceries online for pick-up, which cuts down on impulse purchases. So I’m not surprised that this number was high for January. Still, it was quite high – almost as high as a mortgage payment. Yikes! That’s really unnecessary. I calculated 3/4 of the number to get a rough estimate of what it would look like if we excluded the portion attributable to my mother-in-law and mother, and it was still about $200 higher than I’d like it to be on a typical month. Fortunately, I’ll be returning to meal-planning and a meatless diet this week, which should cut this number considerably. I’m also going to have a chat with my husband about purchasing less alcohol, as this contributed to the high grocery bills too. I think we can easily reduce our monthly grocery spending without feeling like we’re sacrificing much, freeing up a couple hundred dollars to put towards long-term savings goals.
4. Dining out. I’ve long known that we eat out more than we should. I enjoy cooking and prepare most of our meals at home, and my mother-in-law has been cooking a lot for us too, but we still eat out a couple times a week. I also learned from going through the receipts that my husband treats himself to fast-food breakfast and coffee a few times a month, and I too am prone to occasional afternoon coffee runs. As with the grocery bill, the dining-out total is higher this month both because we have an extra family member with us and because we ate out more often while traveling. Still, the number was pretty astounding: more than a mortgage payment! Between groceries and eating out, we spent the equivalent of TWO mortgage payments on food in one month. Food may be essential to live, but there is no reason we should be spending that much on it. One or two dinners out per week should be sufficient, and there are easy ways to enjoy a restaurant meal without spending a fortune, like drinking water, foregoing appetizers and desserts, and sticking with meatless dishes. I calculated 2/3 of our January restaurant spending to estimate how much was attributable just to me and my husband (the baby doesn’t get his own meals at restaurants yet), and it was still more than $750! That is just crazy. There is definitely room to save in this category.
5. Pet expenses. I spent about $108 on my cat in January, comprised of litter, treats, and a vet bill. These aren’t expenses I plan to cut, but it’s worth noting that pets are a financial investment. Plan accordingly if you’re considering getting one.
6. Beauty expenses. The good news is that I didn’t buy any makeup in January. Nevertheless, between getting my hair done (color, cut, style, tip) and skin-care products, I spent nearly $200 to look good. While I’d like to say I’ll reduce my spending in this category, I know that I probably won’t. Listen, no woman wants to look old any sooner than necessary. It is what it is.
7. Charity. I make automatic monthly donations to a few charitable organizations, supplemented with one-off donations during fundraising campaigns or as I see fit. In January, I donated just over $40. Honestly, this number should be a lot higher. Perhaps I can take some of the money I hope to save on food and redirect it to charitable giving.
8. Blog expenses. I spent about $21 on this website this month. Yes, running this site costs money. No, it didn’t earn me any income that would offset those costs. You can help with this number by disabling your ad blocker or white-listing Alexigraph and occasionally clicking on an ad or two. Also, please share my posts. Thanks, friend!
9. Clothing. I made one clothing purchase in January. It was a dress I’d been eyeing for quite some time from one of my favorite brands. I saw a second-hand one in my size on Poshmark, and after waiting a few days for the price to drop, I decided to pull the trigger. It cost $76 (a new one costs $165). I had buyer’s remorse pretty much immediately. I’m 1/3 of the way into another round of Project 333, so I won’t even be able to wear this dress for another two months, and I really don’t need another dress. I’m already thinking about reselling it. Hopefully I’ll remember this the next time I start poking around on online shopping sites. I also spent $11.03 on dry cleaning and $27 on alterations.
10. Family photos. I spent $0.99 on iCloud storage and $46.41 on a hardcover album of baby pictures from Shutterfly. I’ve been meaning to nix the iCloud storage in favor of Google Photos or another free service, but I haven’t eliminated iCloud yet, partially because I’m a little worried about losing my stuff and the redundancy of having things saved in multiple places gives me comfort. The photo album was too expensive, and I’ll probably buy future albums once or twice a year from a cheaper vendor like Chatbooks, but it’s a nice album and I’m glad to have those memories preserved in hard-copy form. Hopefully the album will last many years and I can eventually pass it on to my son.

So now that I’ve reviewed a month’s worth of spending and am more informed about exactly where my money is going, what do I plan to change? Here are my goals for February (and future months, but I will probably reassess after this month):

1. Grocery budget: No more than $500 (hopefully less in future months)
2. Dining out budget: No more than $400 (same)
3. Gas: We have one lengthy road trip planned this month, to take my mother-in-law to the airport in DC. Otherwise, we don’t have any weekend trips planned, so hopefully we can keep our fuel costs under $400.

Because we have no overnight trips planned for the month, I don’t expect that we’ll need to spend anything on lodging. I also don’t anticipate buying any additional photo albums or clothes. I’m generally okay with the amounts I spent in other categories, so I’m not going to set budgets for those right now and will instead plan on keeping my spending in those areas consistent.

I’ve never been in the habit of budgeting for everyday expenses, so sticking to a budget for the month may be challenging for me. Getting my husband to stick to the budget and regularly tracking our progress will take some effort as well. I already use Mint to track the money I spend on my own credit cards and bank accounts, but I’ll have to sit down regularly with my husband and record the expenses that are going on his cards so we can stay on track.

Do you have a budget for everyday expenses? How do you stick to it, especially as a family? What are your biggest problem areas for overspending? I’d love to read your tips and tricks in the comments!

If you enjoyed this post, please share.