Have you ever felt unsatisfied even though you know that what you have is exactly what you once wanted? There’s a term for that: hedonic adaptation. It refers to how the momentary happiness of something new wears off quickly, and we adjust to our changed circumstances. The thing we wanted becomes normal and unexciting once we have it for a while.
Read moreTrigger warning for those with eating disorders: This post discusses dietary restrictions.
I’m a big fan of 30-day challenges, and I’ve done a bunch of them throughout my life. Project 333, the Minimalist Game, Whole 30, a month as a vegan, 30 days of daily yoga, meditation, writing…you can make a 30-day (or 3-month, or 1-year) challenge out of just about any goal. I also frequently impose rules on myself, like the time I didn’t allow myself to buy any more clothes until I had worn every single item already in my wardrobe at least once, or when I tried the Every Other Day Diet or becoming a vegetarian. So why do I keep doing this stuff? We live in a free society! Why not just let myself do whatever I want to do in the moment?
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I got a request to write about minimalism from a mom’s perspective, and right before my son’s first Christmas seems like a great time to do that. Some background for anyone who hasn’t been following me for a while: Over the past year or two, I’ve become increasingly interested in the concept of minimalism. I’ve been working to declutter my home, curb my shopping habit, pare down my wardrobe, and generally eliminate from my life those things that are unnecessary and not useful so that I can better focus my attention and resources on the things that are important to me.
While I hesitate to call myself a minimalist (I still own a lot of stuff), my mindset about the acquisition and retention of belongings has shifted in a way that I suspect will be permanent. It’s become easier for me to let go of what isn’t serving me, to resist the urge to buy new things, and to give more generously. Getting rid of excess stuff has been cathartic, and having fewer things in my house feels both calming and energizing. Letting go of unnecessary material things is really about something bigger — with each item I remove, I’m releasing either an attachment to the past or a worry or insecurity about the future. I’ve rid myself of weighty reminders of who I once was and what I felt I should be or do. Paring down my possessions has been a truly freeing experience.
Read more“I make myself rich by making my wants few.”
–Henry David Thoreau
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Yesterday was the last day of my initial #Project333 attempt, and I’m happy to report that I stuck with the challenge for the full three months! I did cheat in two small ways: I borrowed a pair of gloves when I was visiting my mom because it was really cold, and I borrowed a hoodie from a friend when we spontaneously decided to spend sometime outside after brunch and I hadn’t prepared for the chilly weather. Otherwise, I limited myself to the initial list I posted three months ago. I replaced my black pantsuit mid-challenge, which is something I had contemplated doing before I started this because the old one was getting pretty worn (I had bought it in 2011 and worn it heavily). Since I just replaced one black pantsuit with another that looked pretty similar, I didn’t consider that to be going outside my 33 items.
So how did it go? Well, dressing for essentially three seasons with 33 items was tough. When I started the challenge, it was hot here, and I wished I had included a pair of shorts. When I finished, it was cold and snowy, and there were days when my fleece-lined trench coat wasn’t quite warm enough for the winter weather. I managed okay, but it would have been nice to have some gloves and a heavier coat. The temperatures during the past three months have ranged from the 20s to the 80s, which is a big spread. I could probably control for some of that variation by timing the three-month seasons differently, but I live in a place with a variable, unpredictable climate, so big swings in the weather are probably unavoidable here. It may have been smarter for me to swap out some unnecessary accessories (a second pair of earrings, a thin scarf) for some more seasonally-practical items.
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