Over the past few months, I’ve been working on tuning in to my body. The first lesson that Kara Loewentheil teaches in her coaching program is that emotions are physical sensations in the body. To process an emotion, you have to allow yourself to feel the physical sensation and then name it. When I feel a lump in my throat, a knot in my stomach, a racing heart, or heat rising in my face, I now stop and take note of it. I observe the physical sensation with curiosity. I ask myself, what thought is causing this emotion? What can I learn from it? What is my body trying to tell me?
I opened up Jean Chatzky’s weekly HerMoney newsletter yesterday to see an article called “6 Things You’re Unintentionally Doing (Or Saying) In the Workplace That Could be Holding You Back in Your Career.” Career advice articles abound on the internet, and when I clicked on the article, I figured it would probably contain the same kind of trite advice I’ve read over and over again. To my surprise, though, the first tip really resonated with me, and it’s not one I recall seeing in a workplace advice piece before: Read more
Spring is my favorite season. The longer days and warmer weather lead to very noticeable improvements in my energy level, mood, and overall life satisfaction. Suddenly I seem to need less sleep, and I can actually do things in the evenings.
These changes have been particularly welcome this year because I have a lot of things to do right now. As I’ve previously written, I’ve made a big effort to unbusy myself by making fewer commitments and really prioritizing the things that matter most while saying no to the rest. Nevertheless, as a parent of a young child with a full-time career outside the home, things get busy sometimes. There are only so many hours in the day, and inevitably there are multiple tasks and desires competing for the few hours that aren’t devoted to work, commuting, child care, and sleep. When work becomes busier than usual and spills into the early morning and evening hours, squeezing the time available for chores, relationships, and hobbies, I can start to feeling like I’m jumping from one task to the next from the time I rise until the time I go to bed, with no time to reflect or plan. While the adrenaline produced by that lifestyle can be energizing, constantly reacting to immediate demands is not an ideal state of functioning for the long term.
How do you get on Facebook and not feel insecure when you see pictures of classmates who now have bigger houses/better jobs/more children/more money, etc.?
Great question, and a problem that I’m sure many of us struggle with. First, some data:
The latest episode of The Psychology Podcast is an interview of psychologist Ellen Hendriksen, author of the new book How to Be Yourself. Hendriksen is an expert on social anxiety, and I found the conversation fascinating. The topic goes hand-in-hand with the spotlight effect, which I briefly touched upon in this post and have been meaning to discuss in greater depth.
