If you’ve read this blog for a while, you know I’m a regular meditator. But the “regular” part really only happened within the last year or two. Before that, I had meditated in fits and starts, trying it here and there for a few days or weeks at a time. Then I’d stop because I thought I didn’t have time, and I wasn’t sure if I was doing it right, and I wasn’t seeing obvious changes in myself, despite the research suggesting that meditation can have significant benefits.
What I’ve seen since I’ve begun meditating daily-ish is that change comes gradually, almost imperceptibly, but it does come. Caring for a toddler and a baby frequently presents situations that test my patience. Add to that the stresses of the pandemic, national and world events, family medical issues, and more, and I’ve had many, many opportunities to observe my internal reactions to difficult circumstances in recent months. I’ve noticed that meditation and thought work have allowed me to be a little less reactive, and to respond a little more mindfully.
Do I still overreact to things at times? Yes. Does my sleep-deprived self still get unreasonably annoyed about small inconveniences and occasionally yell at my family? I wish I could say no, but I’m not that zen. Overall, though, I think I am more patient and more likely to shrug things off than I used to be.
I pause long enough before responding to ask myself whether whatever is frustrating me is really a big deal. I consider how my reaction will affect my kids, my husband, my mother, and my relationship with them. I make more of a conscious effort to be present with those around me rather than allowing myself to get lost in thought when I’m with my family. I’m calmer, and I’m more attuned to the impermanence of every situation. I spend more time looking my son in the eye and laughing with him instead of snapping at him.
My goal these days is to underreact rather than overreacting, and while I don’t achieve it all the time, I’m getting there. I meditate before bed, which is tough when I’m tired. Sometimes I only meditate for five minutes. Occasionally, I fall asleep while meditating. Even so, I find that making myself meditate most days is beneficial for my mental health and for my relationships.
If you’re curious about meditation but aren’t sure where to start, I suggest trying the Ten Percent Happier app. I find it to be very accessible and a great way to start a meditation practice.
Do you meditate? What changes have you noticed as a result? Please tell us in the comments.