As you may have guessed from my extended absence, I had my baby! He was born about a week before his due date, and we are both healthy.  Giving birth was an amazing experience.  It was not quite what I expected — my doctor was out of town, my labor was long and I ended up getting an epidural even though I’d hoped to avoid pain meds — but I had an incredible medical and support team, and watching a tiny human emerge from my body was one of the coolest things I have ever been a part of.

Since then, E and I have been getting to know little D and spending most of our time feeding him, changing diapers, doing laundry, catching sleep and eating when we can, and staring at him and cuddling with him every chance we get.  He sleeps a lot, so there are fewer chances than you might expect, but he is gradually becoming more alert and interactive.  We are finding a lot of joy even in the mundane tasks.

So far, parenthood has been a continual exercise in staying present, focusing on what needs to be done in each moment while trying to not miss anything.  I can already see him growing and changing, and while I’m excited to watch him learn and develop, a little part of me can’t help but think how much I’ll miss these early days when they’ve passed.  I’m doing my best not to get too caught up in the housework and chores and making sure that I spend plenty of time taking in all the sweet moments.

I’m happy to report that so far, the sleep deprivation is not as bad as I thought it would be (as someone who’s always needed a lot of sleep, I was worried about that part).  Nevertheless, I seem to forget what I’m doing fairly often, and basic everyday tasks seem like big accomplishments now.  All my usual routines have gone out the window — even small things like writing in my One Line a Day journal before bed.  But I know the routines will return again in time, so I’m not concerned about it.  Someday, I’ll be able to focus a little more on my own pursuits again, but for now, I’m happy to be wrapped up in the day-to-day activities of caring for the cute little helpless guy who is my son (a concept that hasn’t fully set in yet).

And on that note, I hear him starting to cry, so I must sign off for now.  I’ll write more when I can!

With a full heart,

Alexis