Understanding Our Beliefs and Forgiving Ourselves So We Can Move Forward Less Burdened

Pink sky at dusk with silhouetted trees

Maya Angelou gave a slightly different version of her famous quote in reference to her own past: “I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” This sentiment is key to forgiving ourselves for our mistakes. We are all works in progress.

I used to tell myself that I had no regrets in life because every experience was a lesson. While that’s a nice thought in the abstract, there are of course things I wish I had done differently, words I’d love to take back, and decisions I would revisit if I could. When I look at my life today, I see how my present circumstances are largely the consequence of past choices and unquestioned beliefs. I like my life, and I’m generally happy, but I’m also aware of missed opportunities. While I hope I still have a number of years left on this earth, the possibilities for my life don’t seem quite as endless as they once did. I sometimes wonder what my life would look like if I had studied a different major, lived abroad, moved to a big city after college, pursued a different career path, chosen a different law school, not gotten married right after college, or made better financial decisions.

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8 Good Reasons to Take a Hike

Lush scene from a hike in the Pacific Northwest

I’m lucky to live in a beautiful place that offers many opportunities for outdoor recreation.  This year, my husband and I made a New Year’s resolution to go hiking at least once a month.  We felt like we hadn’t been taking full advantage of the landscape around us, and we thought the resolution would be a good incentive to spend more time together and work our way through our guidebooks to local trails and waterfalls.  We’ve really enjoyed our hikes so far and are looking forward to exploring a new spot this weekend.  If you need some inspiration to hit the trails, here are eight good reasons to get outside.

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Learn How to Meditate: An Introductory Meditation Class Recap

A rocky beach with blue water and a clear blue sky

Yesterday, I attended an introductory meditation class at the Appalachian Dharma & Meditation Center in Johnson City, Tennessee. It was a lovely way to spend a Saturday afternoon. I’ve participated in group meditation sessions before, and I’ve picked up meditation tips from various books, YouTube videos, podcasts, and yoga teachers, but I had never taken a class like this. It offered a nice overview of different meditation methods. The teacher, Jody Palm, identified herself as a Tibetan Buddhist, but I appreciated that the class material was secular in nature and free from the religious and pseudo-scientific claims I’ve sometimes encountered in yoga classes.

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People Really Can Change (Including You)

Yellow flowers on a tree against a bright blue sky

You may have noticed that I often write about self-improvement topics.  I’m kind of a self-improvement junkie.  I’ve read many self-help books, and I find psychology fascinating.  (I’m currently reading a new book called The Craving Mind by Judson Brewer – you should check it out.)

Some folks take a cynical view of self-help books, and of their fellow humans.  How many times have you heard phrases like “once a ______, always a ______”?  When I encounter someone I haven’t seen in years, I sometimes fall into the trap of judging them based on things they said and did long ago without getting to know the person they are today.  I’m working to correct this thought process, because I certainly wouldn’t want everyone judging me based on the way I behaved as a teenager or college student.

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Check In With Your Childhood Self

Charcoal drawing of a seated and smiling mother and child
Mother and Child, 2004.

If you’re like me, you’ve wondered from time to time whether you’re on the right path.  You may be contemplating a career move or relocation, or maybe you’ve already hopped around a bit but still don’t feel like you’ve found a perfect fit.  Some people have a passion or a dream that keeps them striving in one direction their whole lives, but for the rest of us, our life trajectory isn’t necessarily so clear.  Sometimes you’re restless or discontented in your current situation, but you don’t know what to change to get yourself unstuck.  When I’ve felt that way, I’ve found it helpful to think about my childhood self.

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