Month: March 2017

People Really Can Change (Including You)

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Yellow flowers on a tree against a bright blue sky

You may have noticed that I often write about self-improvement topics.  I’m kind of a self-improvement junkie.  I’ve read many self-help books, and I find psychology fascinating.  (I’m currently reading a new book called The Craving Mind by Judson Brewer – you should check it out.)

Some folks take a cynical view of self-help books, and of their fellow humans.  How many times have you heard phrases like “once a ______, always a ______”?  When I encounter someone I haven’t seen in years, I sometimes fall into the trap of judging them based on things they said and did long ago without getting to know the person they are today.  I’m working to correct this thought process, because I certainly wouldn’t want everyone judging me based on the way I behaved as a teenager or college student.

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Check In With Your Childhood Self

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Charcoal drawing of a seated and smiling mother and child
Mother and Child, 2004.

If you’re like me, you’ve wondered from time to time whether you’re on the right path.  You may be contemplating a career move or relocation, or maybe you’ve already hopped around a bit but still don’t feel like you’ve found a perfect fit.  Some people have a passion or a dream that keeps them striving in one direction their whole lives, but for the rest of us, our life trajectory isn’t necessarily so clear.  Sometimes you’re restless or discontented in your current situation, but you don’t know what to change to get yourself unstuck.  When I’ve felt that way, I’ve found it helpful to think about my childhood self.

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Quote of the Week

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“A creative life is an amplified life. It’s a bigger life, a happier life, an expanded life, and a hell of a lot more interesting life. Living in this manner—continually and stubbornly bringing forth the jewels that are hidden within you—is a fine art, in and of itself.”

Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

A painting of a woman in a robe, seated at a table, reading
The Reader, 2015. Private Collection.

 

How to Stop Interrupting People

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Good advice to stop interrupting: Keep Calm and Wait for Your Turn

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”
-Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

One of my biggest pet peeves is also one of my own worst habits: interrupting people. I usually do it inadvertently — I think a person has finished speaking and I jump in with whatever is on my mind, only to cut them off in the process. It comes from a place of engagement and wanting to contribute to the conversation, but it’s rude and gives the impression that I’m not interested in what the other person has to say. In an effort to break myself of this habit, I’ve scoured the internet for the best advice on how to stop interrupting people and become a better listener. Here’s a roundup of what I found.

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The Weekend Listen

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A pair of wireless headphones for podcast listening

I listen to a lot of podcasts while driving, working out, and doing chores around the house. In this weekly feature, I’ll tell you about one episode I particularly enjoyed that week.

My pick for this week is Dear Sugar Radio’s episode Location, Location, Location.  Dear Sugar is hosted by Cheryl Strayed (of Wild fame) and Steve Almond, who answer letters from listeners asking questions about love and life.  It’s kind of a modern-day advice column, in audio format.  This week, they tackle the topics of home (as in, what makes a place feel like home?), relocation, and travel, in the context of relationships.

Want more podcasts?  Here are my runners-up for the week:

Need a tutorial on how to listen to podcasts?  Here you go.

Are you listening to a podcast that I haven’t mentioned yet?  Let us know about it in the comments!