Letting Go of Shoulds

Photo of the author on a golf course
Me, back when I sometimes played golf, and wore polo shirts

I have a confession to make: I don’t really like golf.  I mean, it’s okay.  If I were forced to spend an afternoon playing golf, I wouldn’t hate it.  I’d probably enjoy being outdoors and socializing as I made my way through 18 holes.  But I don’t love it.  The few times I’ve played a full round of golf, I got pretty bored by about the 11th hole.  Golfing is okay, but it wouldn’t be my first choice for how I want to spend my free time and money.

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Project 333: Who’s With Me?

A photo of my 33-piece fall wardrobe

Over the past few months (years?), a thought has occurred to me with increasing frequency: I spend a LOT of time, mental energy, and money on what I wear.  From reading fashion blogs, to planning the next day’s outfit, to trying to find the perfect companion for that unique item I bought, to online shopping, to trying on and returning purchases, clothes and accessories have claimed too much of my life.  So I’m ready to say enough.  It’s time to refocus all that energy and money on more important things.

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Imagining the Ideal Life

Black and white photo of a wooden bridge in the woods

Yesterday I had the pleasure of conducting mock interviews of law students in preparation for the upcoming interview season.  They were eager and well-prepared, looking out at the endless possibilities that lay ahead if them.  I asked them where they saw themselves five years after graduation, and I answered their questions about my job, including what had led me to it, what I loved about it, and what, if anything, I might change.

When I was in their position ten years ago, I hated the “where do you see yourself in x years?” question.  I had no real vision for my future.  I guess I figured if I followed all the recommended steps — work hard, get good grades, network, get a good job at a big firm — everything would fall into place and I’d end up with the life I was supposed to have, whatever that was.  I really didn’t know enough about the world or myself to know what I wanted my life to look like.  I could recite answers to interview questions, but the visions I described were really other peoples’ ideas of what a good life and career looked like.

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