The Best Career (and Life) Advice I’ve Read in a While

Relief statue of a human face in the woods

I opened up Jean Chatzky’s weekly HerMoney newsletter yesterday to see an article called “6 Things You’re Unintentionally Doing (Or Saying) In the Workplace That Could be Holding You Back in Your Career.” Career advice articles abound on the internet, and when I clicked on the article, I figured it would probably contain the same kind of trite advice I’ve read over and over again. To my surprise, though, the first tip really resonated with me, and it’s not one I recall seeing in a workplace advice piece before: Read more

Being Adopted, Part I: An Incomplete Self

Charcoal drawing of a seated and smiling mother and child
Mother and Child, 2004.

I learned I was adopted when I was four years old. My parents didn’t mean to tell me yet, but someone else told me and I asked them about it. They did intend to tell me eventually, but I don’t know that they had decided when the perfect time would be.

Four was as good an age as any. The news wasn’t shocking or devastating. I understood the basic premise: my biological mother couldn’t care for me, and my birth parents couldn’t have children but wanted a child, so I became theirs. I thought it was kind of a cool story, something that made me special and different. As a four-year-old, I didn’t really have the emotional capacity to delve beneath the surface of this new information. Over the years, what it means to be adopted would gradually unfold, coloring all aspects of my life and personality. Thirty years later, I’m still learning how it affects me.

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Ask Alexis: How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem?

Charcoal portrait sketch of a young woman
Erika, 2004.

Caroline wrote to me with the following question:

I struggle with my self-confidence. Do you have any suggestions for building self-esteem? I love your confidence. Do you remember any lessons your parents taught you that helped your self-esteem/confidence?

Thanks for the question, Caroline!  First, let me say this:  You have just as much right to be on this planet as everyone else.  You are a unique, worthy person who has many gifts to give: gifts of perspective, kindness, creativity, and more.  We are all works in process, learning and growing as we move through life.  Though it may at times seem like others have everything figured out while you’re still struggling to feel comfortable in your own skin, rest assured that everyone has moments of self-doubt.

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